A Case of Schadenfreude

You fail?… I gloat;
Listen to my anecdotes:

Not had a good trip?
… Oh, please get a grip.

Cat got your tongue?
… You are highly strung.

You fell in the drink?
… Well, I’m tickled pink.

 Stung by a bee?
… cause for my glee.

 You, a busted flush?
… Then you should get the push.

Dismissed to the ranks?
… I’m feeling no angst.

 So, you missed the boat?
… then I will gloat.

 They pulled out the plug?
… that makes me feel smug.

So, you’re in litigation?
… I feel the elation.

 And you’ve mud on your face?
… You are a disgrace.

What – You are annoyed?
Me? – Pure Schadenfreude!