My Vaccination Dream

My vaccine hub had called,
Asked me to take the jab.
At first I hummed and stalled,
Then rang and booked a cab.

It was very cold outside,
I’d never known it colder.
My bones had ossified,
And my nerves began to smoulder.

I coughed and gave a sneeze,
I couldn’t bear the cold.
The air was fit to freeze
The taxi’s exhaust manifold.

Of the needle I am scared,
But when I saw the size,
“I’ll take it”, I declared,
As I squeezed shut both my eyes.

“You’ll just feel a little prick”,
The nurse she said to me,
And I suddenly felt sick,
All I wished to do was flee.

Now in my upper limb,
Since I went behind that screen,
I am full up to the brim
With tetrafluoroethylene.

In fact I had the Pfizer
The other – my waking dream;
It didn’t really happen
So now I’m back on theme.

Deo Volente

DEO VOLENTE

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Cometh the day
Cometh the ban
Yet another deprivation
Another death for motivation
Covid Nine still running wild
Meaning for us
Nothing good
Nothing mild
Just another tight restriction
This is now life
It is not fiction

I tell my family they cannot come
They are not surprised
They do not blanche
Just another faded chance
Not something else to life enhance

Will I one day
Look back and say
When this black cloud has blown away
I lived through covid
Took its measure
Saw it off
Without a cough
Survived to tell new generations
How grandad lived through such privations
Knuckled down
Obeyed the rules
Derided all those other fools
Who didn’t care
Who took it easy
Yet also lived to tell the tale

I can’t help but think
With a nod and a wink
Life’s still worth living
D. V. – God Willing.

Senor Bitzwobble

Senor Bitzwobble

A Spaniard called Senor Bitzwobble
Met the Pobble without any toes,
Who got him to keep very still
While he swatted a fly on his nose.

‘I’ve seen your bits wobble’, said Pobble,
‘I suggest what you need is a mate;
Someone steady and willing
Life would soon become thrilling –  
How about me being your date?’

Well, they soon hit it off and got married,
Well, that’s how this story then goes,
They had many children together –
Married life had its highs and its lows.

Till, one day while they sunbathed together,
As in the bright sun they both dozed,
They both started to cough,
All heir bits then fell off,
And so their sad story then closed.

A Seattle Limerick

‘The Pox Devil’ – WHB, 2018

 

‘Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.’

 

An old hooker who lived in Seattle,
Developed a cough with a rattle.
Yes, she had caught a chill,
And began feeling ill,
And soon knew she was losing the battle.

So she took herself off to the docs,
Who gave her the worst of all shocks,
When he said to her, “Dear,
It would seem to appear,
You’ve contracted a dose of the pox.

If you do not want to be dead,
I suggest you spend less time in bed.
It’s all much too risky,
So when you feel frisky,
Take one of these tablets Instead.”

 

 

 

The Cough With A Rattle

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An old hooker who lived in Seattle
Developed a cough with a rattle;
Yes, she had caught a chill
And began feeling ill,
And felt she was losing the battle.

So she took herself off to the docs,
Who gave her the worst of all shocks.
When he said to her, “Dear,
it would seem to appear,
You’ve contracted a dose of the pox.

If you don’t want soon to be dead,
I suggest you spend less time in bed.
It’s all much too risky,
So when you feel frisky,
Take one of these tablets Instead.

 

Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com

 

Incipience

Photo by Danil Shostak on Pexels.com

I have an incipient cold,
A budding burgeoning cough.
I don’t feel ill,
I’m sentient still,
You can tell me to clear off.

No, you don’t want to catch what I’ve got;
No way would it enhance your lot.
You’d never thank me,
You’d definite-lee,
Be catching a Gordian Knot.

For a cold is a cold is a cold,
Especially if you’re getting old.
You won’t want to feel low,
Just retain status quo,
And let’s keep the future on hold.