The REAL WORLD

‘Planet Earth’ . . .  Watercolour – WHB – 1956

THE REAL WORLD

An Attempted Discourse

You do annoy me at times

And why is that?

Because I think you are losing touch with reality

What makes you think that?

Because the things you do and say do not make sense

To you, maybe, but then I don’t think you are living in the real world yourself

What do you mean ‘the real world’?

‘Reality’

Is that where you live then?

Well, it’s much more real than yours

How do you know that?

Because I use my reason and all my senses.  You don’t.

And how do you know that I don’t?

Because what you do does not make sense

But that’s what I just said to you

Well, I’m saying it now – to you.

But you can’t do that – I started this argument

What argument?

The one we’re having now

No, we aren’t

You see – that’s just what I mean.  You are not being real

Well, I think I am

I just don’t think so

Well, you’d be wrong

Why should you be right and me wrong?

Because you aren’t living in the real world.

Oh . . .   Get real!

I AM NOT MOSES

Sir Edward Coley Burne-Jones … Singing Angels (‘Honesty’) Tapestry 1898 (detail)

Do I just pretend to be open
am I a charlatan at heart
how sincere 
how honest 
when push 
comes to shove 
when the chips are down 
what remains
that is true to my intent

Have I forsaken my promise 
my desire to be me
openly faithful 
truly chaste 
a compassionate soul
struggling for honesty
and resolved to lead
into the Promised Land

My poems are 
imagination’s creatures
but still
slave to whim 
to make-believe 
and the pre-determined end
does this condemn me to 
reach a bargain
to fudge the truth

If so then
has that truth 
become another lie 
or does it just allow me
a latitude
a breadth of narrative 
which covers up 
the shallowness of my intent

I compromise surely
make accommodations to reality
inhibited by
thoughts of entitlement 
feelings of worth
desire to please 
to purchase credibility
a mercenary versifier
forever regretting
that this facade 
must be negotiated
with my better judgement
not wanting to hurt 
protecting decorum and 
further weakening honesty 
effectively
dissolving the truth

And yet 
rather this 
than face the rejection 
that surely would follow 
as always 
the truth that 
no – I am no wunderkind
not tomorrow’s success
nor Destiny’s child
just waiting
to be found

Moses Discovered In The Bulrush  

AMEN

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where does it end
when does it end
know that it never does
never will
there’s always more
more of the same
more that differs
more that extends into yet more
it is the very nature of existence
and reality remains without end
for dead or alive
we she he it
there is only Infinity
and infinite tomorrows
forever everlasting eternity
bending into time without end
AMEN – So Be It

Your World Or Mine?

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The world in which you live is not my world,
Close as we intermingle when we meet.
However much I try to understand,
The gap between us still is bitter-sweet.

It holds its mysteries which I cannot breach,
Try as I always do to understand.
Your loves, your passions, seem to me as strange
As some unfathomed febrile wonderland.

But when I hold you in my midnight thoughts,
When dreams replace that cold reality,
It is as though we are completely one,
How trivial, how petty, our disparity.

 

The Darling Buds

Photo:  ‘In a Surrey Garden’ – WHB – 2012

Here in my quietly cherished garden,
Where  golden flowers grow,
I love to linger long and taste
The flowers that I know.

But now around me where I see
The darling buds of roses,
They bring a powerful sense to me
Of life that decomposes.

Time has brought me to a point
Where life and love are frozen;
Where little I do has meaning, and
My future has been chosen.

For now I’m in a time cocoon
Where life has been suspended..
Where I can look but cannot see,
And reality has ended.

 

Morning Glory

‘Sunrise’ … Watercolour – WHB – 2014

Let me go
Let me run in the early dew
To brush against the laurel’s leaves
Tread the cool earth’s cushion
And linger in the dampness of the silent wood.

Before the cooing of the collared bird,
The bite of the new day’s busy-ness,
Its threats and promises,
Breaks into the stillness of my morning world
And ruptures this mood of mystery
Of thrill and almost menace,
Leaving me to face another day of reality
One more acceptance of the wrenching truth.

 

Reverie #2: Magic

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Magic is the catalyst for change 
It stirs the open mind
Bringing meaning to Mystery
Blessings to Belief

And when the cauldron of mist is stirred
Then both the Gloom 
And the Glitter are captured
Restrained
Resuscitated  
Then allowed to flourish

To become hope for the future
Of the world’s Sorcery
The creation of a new reality
The super and the supra-natural essence
Of what has been
The foundation of what will yet be
Channeling the birthright of an abiding
And more fulfilling Necromancy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Books

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Since my time began

These paper-pallid treasures

Have mirrored my journey

Have been my journey

Life’s loved luggage

My mind’s mainstay

Collected and cosetted

Divided sub-divided

Arranged and ordered

Guarded and bound

Glanced at and absorbed

Ravaged and discarded

My bulwark against reality

Whilst being my reality

Promising me a solid future

Proving their worth

whilst bolstering my own

 

Adding to the sum

of all I’ve drunk,

Those words I’ve feasted on

Swollen into my life’s core

Embodied now as part of me

Woven into the coarseness of my fabric

Sold to receptive ears

Refined by other germs of passage

Now become the amalgam that is me

And part of every book I’ve ever read.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I Am Roland

Statue of Roland at Metz railway station, France.

I am Roland 
or I have become him
created the myth of Mr Keld
opportunity taken 
I have procured my host’s mind 
now an alien presence
absorbed into this foreign body
diverting thoughts 
rebuilding a past 
guessing at a further future 
a variant stated truth 
inhabiting a different reality
masking neutrality
approval seeking
in a subsumed persona
a manufactured myth
ambushed by his muse
Roland of Roncevaux
reconvened
brandishing Durendal
to fight new battles
forever a mask
behind which to hide 
a second rate hero
his fable exposed
another fiction
masquerading as truth

 

My Fantasy

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I’ve lived outside my fantasy
But now I’m moving in
Reality removes itself 
No chance I’ll let it win

The safe distance I have kept
Recedes, becomes the past, 
And dreams become the truth for me
My day has dawned at last

Life and love are now as one
Merging desire and hope 
Becoming all that promise meant
Ensuring I will cope.