For Starters

What to choose for starters?

Yes, I know I’m hard to please.

While others make decisions

I sit there ill at ease.

Shall I indulge in mushrooms?

Is the better bet the soup?

While I study and consider

Eyes glaze and eyelids droop.

I cannot bear the goats cheese;

Prawn cocktail leaves me cold.

I know I’m getting fussy

And my taste buds are quite old.

Asparagus is stringy,

The pâté’s often off.

The pepper in the mackerel

So often makes me cough.

Canapés are dainty,

But can be very bland.

Whitebait’s a non-starter.

Calamari should be banned.

Focaccio or bruschetta?

No, they’ll make my stomach leaden;

Perhaps my taste receptor cells

Have died and gone to heaven.

Fried brie does sound exciting,

But it’s sticky – makes me sick.

Oh, please, forget the starters

The main course please – and quick!