The Golden Gooseberry

The Tale Of a World-beating Gooseberry
Recently recorded at Egton Bridge Gooseberry Show, North Yorkshire

Keep me from a Golden Gooseberry
It would not enrich my days

Not to be tasted
Not for a pie
Not to be handled
Don’t ask me why.

Treat it with care
For it is unique
The world has not seen
Such a singular freak

I have to confide
It weighs 2 ounces plus
I should not deride
But it’s acidulous,
I find it it quite sour
Makes me wriggle and lour.

No, a goosegog that size,
A duck’s egg in disguise,
I don’t find appealing;
My senses are reeling.

About the Ribes uva-crispa,
Looking somewhat like a blister,
I cannot get excited,
My lust has certainly been blighted.